Thursday, December 29, 2011


Ah, the new year, a chance to start over. A chance to make yourself a better person. A chance to leave the past behind.

My resolution last year was: "Be more thoughtful"  
(I'm carrying this one into 2012 with me because it was a good resolution and I want to keep working on it).

My resolution for 2012 is this: "Have no fear" 
2012 is going to be a big year. In order to reach my goals, fear and worry have to be nonexistent. I am really excited for what's to come so here is a list of my goals for the new year: 
* Move- Planning on Los Angeles unless there is a job offer elsewhere 
* Get a job in the fashion field- Would love an assistant design job 
* Travel more- Anywhere 

It's a small list full of huge changes that I feel so ready to make.  

Happy New Year!!!


Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Chicago Love

Today I received a lovely postcard from two of my Chicago fashion favorites. It was just what I needed. I miss them so much.

I can't help but think of a really nice duet of Martha Wainwright and Snow Patrol...
"I find the map and draw a straight line
Over rivers, farms, and state lines
The distance from 'A' to where you'd be
It's only finger-lengths that I see"


Saturday, December 24, 2011


From two very cool friends of the family

My favorite one

 They always do a pretty great job with their gift giving.
Thanks so much for my awesome gifts!

Trendy Angels

Dad "she is probably up in heaven putting sequins on the Angel's wings" 

 He is probably right. And belting their huge frocks so their waists are accentuated.

Miss you Lo Bird. This Christmas is a little empty without your cheer.


Christmas Shopping

Some tips for next year:

1. Wear flat shoes preferably with some traction
2. Don't wear wool, or heavy layers while running about because you will roast alive waiting in line
3. Bring your phone to keep you occupied waiting in line, or in case you need to call someone for a size or color
4. Stay hydrated!
5. Park at the back of the parking lot. You are wasting time and gas waiting for that perfect spot. And you will get out quicker in a less condensed area. Also everyone could probably use a little extra exercise this time of year.
6. Have a snack in your purse/pocket
7. Always be kind to the workers/cashiers; would you want to do their job? 
8. Don't forget your list, and mark things off as you go along so it feels awesome when you've got everything
9. Know the store before you enter, or ask someone where things are.
10. Have your form of payment ready, along with coupons.
11. Make sure you have gas in your vehicle
12. If you cannot remember if you need tape, wrapping paper et cetera; get it while you are there so you don't have to run out


Thursday, December 22, 2011

Pocketed Underwear

The point of blogging to my knowledge is to share much too much information with your family, friends and complete strangers. For the most part I do not hold back, but on occasion I save a post as a draft and contemplate whether I should show it to our handful of readers or just keep it for myself. This may be one of those times that I would have saved it but today it is happening.

In the last week I have ended up with my underwear in my pocket twice. Don't get excited because there wasn't any sex involved nor was there an extremely interesting story but here you are still reading....Sometimes I just hate hate HATE the pair of underwear I have chosen and on this particular day I had pockets which doesn't happen often because I tend to not wear pants. So I took them off in the bathroom; problem solved.

Now for round two: when you are used to living by yourself which I still blame all of my mishaps on even though it has already been a year, you leave your shit everywhere. The bathroom is usually scattered with my clothing including my unmentionables that I am clearly mentioning. But my dad has been off of work, my brother is home and he has friends of the male kind. So I had to snatch up a pair of my "ders" and stuff them in my bathrobe that I was wearing at the time. The best part of these underwear stories is that I carried my underwear in my pocket for hours. Once in a while I would go to get my phone out of my pocket and start to pull them out. Some days it may just be easier to forget the underwear all together.

Now that I have shared much too much information I realize that I sometimes blog to see if these things happen to other people of if they do the same things that I do.  All in all, I do some silly things.

Happy Holidays, Bitches


Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Roald Dahl

Apparently Roald Dahl had sexual conquests... am I the last to know this? Are people aware that the man who wrote classics like "BFG" and "The Fantastic Mr. Fox" was a sexual deviant?!?! Also he was a British Secret Agent. What a saucy minx.

I am so intrigued.

On another but similar note have you seen Shel Silversteins "adult" work. It is splendid. I bought one of the books for my grandpa for christmas a few years back titled "Around The World". It is a collection of all the cartoons he drew for Playboy.


Saturday, December 17, 2011

All My Life

All my life I have never been one of those people that have a ridiculous amount of shoes, maybe more than I needed yes, but never so many pairs I didn't know what to do with. I also never had more than one perfume at a time. I would search and search for the right one and I would use it until it ran dry, literally. But I have changed my ways; why not wear a different fragrance every day? And a different pair of shoes everyday? I still don't own that many pairs of shoes. These are the things I have always had an abundance of: coats for all types of seasons, t-shirts (which has dwindled significantly), socks, underwear, winter attire including gloves, hats and scarves. These are a few of the bestest: Madame Chanel, Monsieur Prada, Monsieur Boss, Monsieur Burberry, Monsieur Jacobs, and Monsieur Lauren.



This blog that I follow refers to Gweneth Paltrow as "Goop" because of her website named "Goop". And I get the feeling that this writer dislikes Ms. Paltrow. And I don't really like most of the parts she takes however she has had a few wonderful roles. I quite enjoy Shakespeare In Love and I do think she does a pretty swell job at playing a woman playing a man. Also Joseph Fiennes is fine. I also really enjoy The Royal Tenenbaums. She plays a great Margo; emotionless and stiff. I really don't know what she would be like in "real life" but I know she eats of organic fancy dancy things that are amazing for your body.

I will continue to eat my caramel hershey kisses that end up in the hip region.


Middle School

At the moment I am drinking a Mountain Dew in hopes that it will keep me awake for the next five to six hours so I can give my brother a big hug when he gets home from college. As I sip on this green can and by green I mean the color not environmental awesome, it only brings me back to middle school. All I need is some Cooler Ranch Doritos, my basement full of friends, and a scary movie.

Were these common when you were in middle school? What did you consume so much of that you can hardly eat now?



When I travel back to good old Chicago I usually get lost. My go to is always Mr. Hertzberg. He's got Chicago's floor plan burned into his brain along with the bus and train routes. It is simply fantastic. I am currently learning Saint Paul so that I can simply direct a stranger at the tip of a hat. This is one of Andrew's many strange knowings but at the moment I cannot think of anymore other than him thinking he isn't a hipster but in fact he truly is.

Me reacting to Andrew getting out his iphone: "oooo such a hipster, where is your chrome bag?!"
Andrew: "At home with my fixed."

This may or may not have happened while I was emptying the contents of my chrome bag. Tehehe

Hahaha, Happy Birthday Asshole


Friday, December 16, 2011

Lady Bird

Lo and I had just gotten back from Target and we brought all of your things into the living room. And I immediately went to my room to get my new Polaroid to take a photo of her with her new umbrella. As I came out of my room she said "I knew you were going to want to take my picture" I dearly miss her


Sunday, December 11, 2011

My Bed

I have spent the last few days in bed due to a broken heart.  Multiple people have come to see me and they have jumped right in with me. And it hasn’t been in a sexual way, but there is just something very comforting about lying side by side with a loved one. We cried, laughed, and slept.  We watched lots of movies, talked a lot of silliness; there was also a lot of silence. But I have felt very safe and loved over this trying time. I will never really understand death itself and I am angry with whatever controls the universe for taking my friend from me. She was too young and wonderful. I can’t imagine life without her.


Friday, December 9, 2011

Ren Gill

Photos taken a few years ago at a party: (top) Merriweather and Ren (Middle) Ren, Medusa, and Merriweather (Bottom) Medusa foot, Ren feet, Merriweather foot

I remember the first time I met Lauren, I was hanging out with Merriweather at CVS and we ran into her... Merriweather: "This is Kelly(Medusa)" Lauren: "What's your sign?." I was instantly a fan of this Lauren girl.   She was a very talented person, she had great taste, she was a total badass, she got shit done and knew pretty much everyone that needed to be known BUT, she was also pretty goofy for being so intimidatingly beautiful.  Also, she's the only person that still used the term "rad" and got away with it. She was a magical person that will be missed by many...


Thursday, December 8, 2011

Lo Bird

Always Silly


Homework In The Park

Merriweather with Bridge and Lo


Meeting Lauren Gill is the best story that I have from college or maybe possibly ever.

I had been having a rough time in Chicago and my boyfriend at the time who was still back in my hometown suggested I go to the CRU (for jesus lovers) meeting to try and meet people. I was uneasy because I didn't feel like being social nor did I want to go by myself, but I fucking did it anyways. So I get there late because I sure as shit don't want to stand around awkwardly at the beginning waiting for it to start. There was a lot of singing and dancing and hand clapping and I was totally not into it. At the end which seems to have taken about a week to get it to one of the people in charge announces there is "soda" and pizza in the back so feel free to come on over and have a good time. Have a good time eh? Good god. And I distinctly remember it being off brand pop and there was no way in hell I was drinking 'RC Cola'. So when everyone got up I stayed in my seat to reflect on what I just witnessed. I looked around and there was only one other person still sitting and it was Ms. Lauren Gill. We gave each other the same weirdwhatthefuckjusthappened look. Then I looked away and before I could look back at her she was sitting next me. "HI! I'm Lauren, What's your name?" With as much enthusiasm as possible considering all the singing and dancing that we both did not enjoy. So we chatted for a while and found out we lived in the same building, had the same major and thought the meeting was totally strange. The best part of this story is that we became bestest of friends and we never went back to another CRU meeting every again.

Miss you Lo,
Always and Forever you beautiful girl you


Tuesday, December 6, 2011


I own eight pairs of pants, not counting sweat pants, yoga pants etc.
Six pairs are from GAP, one pair is NorthFace, one pair is True Religion.
Three pairs are jeans, two pairs are cords, one pair is khaki, one pair is pin striped and one pair are "zip locks" as my father calls them.
All of them are either much too long or a little too short.
More useless information to come!


Monday, December 5, 2011

Professionals Who Learn Too Much About Strangers

Bartenders are clearly at the top of the top when it comes to getting an ear full from somebody they have never seen before and quite possibly won't ever see again. I've been thinking about the strangers that get a small story about my personal life that I do not actually know very well and it goes like this:

My chiropractor (I've known him for ten years)
Sales ladies/ men at clothing stores
Tattoo Artists
Free Clinic Workers


Best On Screen Kiss

As I was watching 10 Things I Hate About You, a classic awesomeness from the '90's, I couldn't help but think about great kisses in movies. I have tried to come up with a few on my own but I got a little help from my friends.

Heath Ledger and Julia Stiles at the paint ball park in 10 Things I Hate About You (Me)
Ryan Gosling and Amy McAdams when she runs up to him in The Notebook (One of my bestest, Sister)
James Franco and Sophia Myles Tristan and Isolde (Sister)
Matthew MacFayden and Kiera Knightly Pride and Prejudice  (Sister, Me)
Kirsten Dunst and Jamie Dornan while they are rolling around in the prairie Marie Antoinette (Me)
Claire Danes and Leonardo DiCaprio when he climbs the trellis in Romeo and Juliet (Me)
Jennifer Grey and Patrick Swayze at the end of Dirty Dancing when they do the lift (Sprinkles)
Julia Roberts and Richard Gere at the end of Pretty Woman when they are on the fire escape (Dad)
Milla Jovovich and Bruce Willis in The Fifth Element (Mattman)
Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks at the end of You’ve Got Mail (Me)
Lady and Tramp in Lady and the Tramp (Who wouldn't think this was one of the best?)
Steve Martin and Bernadette Peters in The Jerk (Tiedan)
Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman Casablanca (Me)


Vanilla Coke

Vanilla Coke where have you been for the last five years of my life?


Stupid Pill

I swear I take a stupid pill whenever I see my drawrer friend. Partly because he is always on his toes and comes back with some great wit, but also I tend to just take it and not stand up for myself which mainly happens because I back myself into a corner. And I tend to be the only female amongst a large group of the nerdiest men you will ever EVER meet.  Okay, maybe not the nerdiest however they are very attached to their computers and video games and they talk a lot of jargon. So I play stupid, well maybe I don’t play stupid I just don’t fucking understand what the hell they are talking about. But I know things about other things just not computers, or how fast things download or the pixelation of my flat screen television set, OKAY? I could pretty much care less about that shit however I like their company so I keep them around. Plus I always have my cell phone to keep me entertained. But none of them know anything about sewing or patterning or fractions. Without people like me they would be without clothing! Well maybe not without clothing, but without clothing that sort of kind of fits or that is some what cool. I am just an under appreciated female, hahaha never heard that one before!



Daytons …
After work today my father and I sat in traffic in order to get to Macy's in downtown Minneapolis. I needed to get a bridal shower gift for a cousin who is to be wed in January. And there was apparently some big deal going that I was unaware of until I was handing over my State I.D. and current credit card so that I could get a Macy’s credit card to save lots and lots of money.  While we were waiting for the sales lady who was so wonderful and patience and amazing to look up the kitchen aid mixer that my dad insisted on getting today, my dad kept finding more things to purchase. First comes the frango mints, no complaints there, no sir-e. Then comes a package of colorful knives. Then he decided I should finally get the iron I’ve been wanting for years and he offers to pay for half, can’t go wrong there. Then comes the microwave oven, which is on the clearance rack and is box less. So we open the little door, check that it has a broil selection like the other ones and I play with the rest of the knobs. Well the little knob that says dark medium light lighter unbeknowist to me is a timer and of course I have turned it alllllllll the way to dark. So we giggle to ourselves because there are lots of frantic customers running about. So after a few minutes pass and more people seem to be cramming around the tiny little register that we have been hanging around for the better part of an hour, the timer goes off with a loud “ding” as timers tend to do. Dad and I just lose it with hysterical laughing.  And I as I am about to explain to some slightly disgruntled shoppers that I may or may not have accidently played the knobs, dad yells “Pies done! Better take it out!” And we lose it again, can’t breathe from more hysterical laughing. What makes this story better and our laughing louder is that nobody, absolutely nobody thought it was funny. All we received were some dirty looks and some upturned noses, hahahaha.  So of course I can’t pass up an awkward moment and I say maybe slightly louder than I should have in between giggles “Guess that wasn’t funny”. But ya know what when silly old ladies who are spending lots of money think they can be snobby and mean we have every right to be as silly as possible and make friends with the sales lady. And we did just that, along with raking up a bill somewhere along the lines of cinco benjamines. Take that bitches, stuff that in your rotting mink coat from 1973.