Slacker

My computer broke (big surprise) so I have neglected my duties for a little while now. But I have a grand old Wisconsin story to tell and it goes a little something like this:

One of my bestest and I were driving the back way home from a neighboring town when we get around this bend in the road and see a cop. And they are fucking everywhere lately EVERYWHERE. So we slow down but we are still a good ways away and we think he has only pulled someone over and we can breeze by but that is certainly not the case. We get closer and closer and c l o s e r.

"Hey what is that truck doing on the other side of the road? Why is that man standing around? Why is that fucking cop parked in our lane? Why is he moving the car so that it is fully blocking our lane? Why is he getting out of the car? What the fuck is THAT?"

This cop hops out of the car with a farely large rifle and my hands instinctively cover my eyes immediately. I hear a gun shot and squeal and she tells me to keep my eyes shut because what they were shooting was wiggling around and I would not be pleased. Then another gun shot. Boy oh boy I wish we had closed the windows. They were shooting what seemed to be a rabies infected raccoon. Blah. I am all for killing animals because it is the circle of life however I am not a hunter, nor do I want to hunt nor do I want to know anything about killing animals. I like to pretend I don't know things because I remember shit like this and I have been thinking about for the last two days since it happened. And I know it was probably in pain and it was dangerous and blah blah blah blah blah, it still freaked me out a great deal.

I shall return,

Merriweather